Just like a Pisces

to be weak willed and over emotional. I am a puppet. I am lost. I am so indecisive it drives me insane which is another one of my infamous qualities. Insanity- to repeat something over and over and expect a different result each time. I am a hopeless romantic. I am the best lover I can be , but I can also be very jealous and territorial. I spend more time thinking of what will come , what I hope will come , and what could happen more than I think about what is going on at the moment. That’s not such a bad thing considering I have a tendency to be on point with my assumptions. But it does hurt to tear away from the present. You may think you know me because I like to talk a lot , but you don’t. Nobody knows me like God knows me. I don’t even know myself yet. I will never tell you anything and I will always keep your secrets. I break down a lot , I don’t know what it is that makes me so emotionally unstable. I could be content with being alone… it would probably be my fault anyways. I truly am a fish swimming through the ocean , sometimes coasting in the current to stop a bit and just relax. , but only for a day or two. I like to move quick. If there is no set plan I am not content. Hell , I’m never content. I am either one extreme or the other: absolutely fucking happy or depressed to no end. But I am happy for the most part. I really try not to let my emotions get the best of me. I love to cook. Cooking distracts me. When someone enjoys what I’ve made them , it makes my day. I love trying new things. I love alcohol. I hate drinking and try to do it as sparingly as possible. When I am upset , I crave it… but I am proud that I have learned to control myself. I love attention. Whether I’m at work , school , or just out with friends I love to be loud. I love to laugh. I love when someone can make me laugh. My boyfriend can make me laugh better than anybody I have ever known. He’s also the only person I can hold conversations with. He’s the only person I trust and the only one I respect. Everything always feels like the end of the world , but it really isn’t. Writing this kinda sorta maybe makes me feel poetic. This is really just my thoughts pouring out. I cry a lot. Well , not that much anymore but things make me cry very easily. I am quite sensitive so please be nice. I am so ugly. I don’t try to be someone I am not , but I am different from who I was a year ago and please don’t forget that. I have tried and come along way and I hope everyone can see it. My boyfriend doesn’t. Neither can my old friends. I am stone cold. Although , my heart will warm up to anybody quick.

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Posted on Wednesday, 10 August
Tagged as: pisces piscean personal rant why did I even write this
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  4. twater-otter reblogged this from novembris-luna and added:
    I feel like I can relate to this a lot right now.. how auspicious
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